1. The doctor has put you on bed rest even though you're not pregnant..
2. You're already buying diapers for yourself.
3. There's no room for a crib in your nursing home.
4. You already have a walker and don't want to register for a jumperoo.
5. Betty White offers to throw you a baby shower.
6. Your great-great grandkids don't want to babysit.
7. You can't remember where you put your glasses, or the baby.
8. You take Geritol instead of prenatal vitamins.
9. When you read Goldilocks you overemphasize that nice big bowl of too-cold porridge.
10. Your biological clock is a sun dial.
I really like #4